


Loss.

by JenCollins



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Heartbreak, Loss, Loss of Child, Pain of Loss, Parent Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:01:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28053591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenCollins/pseuds/JenCollins
Summary: Dean has lost a lot in his life but losing a child just hits differently.
Relationships: Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Jack Kline & Dean Winchester
Kudos: 5





	Loss.

**Author's Note:**

> Fifth day, fifth new short story.
> 
> Today, once again, i was thrown into thinking about losses and how they make you feel and all that. This time it was about loss of a baby and my mind somehow lead me to SPN and how if anyone than Dean would know how it feels to lose a child, so here is this short fic of today.
> 
> Hope you can enjoy!

Dean knew how it is to lose a child. 

Yes, he never had a baby but that didn't mean that he hasn't been a parent, a father. 

From early on, he understood that he's more than just a big brother for Sam, he needed to be a father and a mother and he did his best to play these roles. 

His heart clenched every time when something bad happened with Sam. 

When their father was being a sadistic asshole toward Sam, Dean felt overprotective, trying his best to shield Sam. 

Sam was more his son than he could ever be John's and Dean was okay about that. 

When he held Sammy in his arms, holding him close and listening how Sam took his last breath, how his heart beat for the last time, something broke into Dean. It was like a part of his heart, part of his soul was ripped out of his whole being, leaving him raw and bleeding. 

So of course Dean did everything he could to save Sam, of course he did. 

The joy and the lightness that followed by seeing Sam open his eyes and starting to be okay again was overwhelming. 

With every new loss, the pain just kept on being just as strong as for the first time. 

Every time he was left with this overwhelming ache trying to eat him alive from inside out and what was even worse was the feeling of Helplessness. 

So when Jack was letting out his last breath and his heart was stopped, Dean was a bit surprised by the familiar ache starting to knit a home inside his chest. 

In that moment he understood that after years, he had gained another son and now he had lost him and he needed to get him back, he just needed to do something. 

Dean sits there, looking at Jack's body, thinking about how well he understands all these parents who need to lose their child, part of their lives. 

Yes, he never gave birth to any of his sons, but he was a father and he knew the loss of a child way too well. 

It was terrible and each time, he had no idea how to survive. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading.
> 
> And remember, even when it feels like the end of the world, there will be a new day, you just need to hang in there. 
> 
> Please don't give up.


End file.
